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How to Avoid Permanent Relationship Damage

marriage relationships time out
Frustrated mom burying head while two kids scream.

As I snapped at my husband for coming into my office and standing there, the aggravation and frustration was still fresh in my mind. 

I just got off the phone from a conference call with my boss who was rattling off fifty million things, (well it seemed like that many), that my team members and I need to accomplish NOW! 

Completing all of these tasks NOW was unachievable and the more I thought about it, the shorter my fuse got.

Now here I was taking it out on my sweet husband who just wanted to tell me something.

First Steps to Stop the Relationship Damage

Does this ever happen to you? 

Maybe there is pressure at work, a project you are trying to complete but are constantly interrupted? 

Or you’re attempting to repair or install something, but keep running into challenges? Or another person said or did something to set you off. 

Then you find yourself taking it out on your children, spouse or someone else who has done nothing wrong.

How do we stop the madness? 

For me, when I realized I was taking my anger out on my hubby, first I felt guilty and then I gave him a hug and kiss and said, “I’m sorry for being so cranky.” Then I filled him in on my conference call. 

Take a Time Out

The next thing I decided to do before I projected this attitude onto anyone else was take a “time out” away from other living beings and write my thoughts and feelings down on paper to get them out of my head.  

Other ways to get what’s “eatin” you off your minds is to take a walk, call a friend and vent, read, listen to a podcast or audio book, watch your favorite show or participate in anything that will change your thoughts to the better.

So, the next time someone or something pushes your buttons and you feel that surge of ugliness coming on, take a “time out” to keep from hurting others and having regret.

 You can always say you’re sorry but you can never take back hurtful words or actions.

 We all deserve kindness and love. 

Each of us “owns” everything we say and do. So let’s avoid causing permanent damage to our relationships and exercise self-control in managing our state of mind. 

What if we all had that kind of discipline?  I suspect therapists would probably have a lot more time on their hands. :)

 

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